Thursday, August 21, 2008

Tada!!

It was just two days ago my mom was commenting on how my kids know how to pop the perfect smile for the camera. Not a big shocker with my photography background. It's one of two things I've mastered as a mom. (The other would be hiding in the bathroom at bedtime.) Point a camera in their face and say "hey" - and tada! It's a perfect picture smile. And now, look at my dog! (top left) It took a couple tries but she gave me a definite "look" for the camera. Look at that cute pootchie, pootchie, poo!!! (Eva's cute too but she's been around a lot longer.)

This picture was taken last night as the final photo in Eva's ME project which was due today. Nothing like waiting till the last minute. Which is exactly what Tim did last night when he tried to buy several gift cards on his way out of town for a conference tomorrow. (Just stay with me here.) It wouldn't have been such a big deal if I'd KNOWN he was going to spend over $300 in gift cards at a Kroger in Greenfield. Had I KNOWN this I wouldn't have told the credit card company to decline the charge when they called me at 8:00pm in the middle of homework, snacks, bedtime and general squirrelling about. (I pictured a druggie buying $300 of Fritos and Funyuns mind you.) It's ok when I wait till the last minute Tim, but it's not ok when you do it. Especially when it causes me gastrointestinal problems.

Now, that I've gotten myself in trouble... I'd just like to say getting three kids on the bus at the same time every morning is a test from God. And it's one that I'm going to fail as well. If the objective is to just get them on the bus, bruised and battered with their self-esteem at an all time low, then I'll pass.

So, here's how it goes. First I let Olive out. Then I spend the next half hour poking kids till they get up, then eventually I drag Eva out of bed, fix three different breakfasts, cut the "skin" off toast, let Isaac put his own cinnamon/sugar on his toast (this requires me to do a Marty Feldman - one eye on the toast the other on what I'm doing). Let Olive in. Go over two different menus for lunch and then inevitably make three different lunches. Remove Little People from Olive's teeth and let her out. Stand over the girls so they actually put their clothes on and not just lie lifeless on their beds. Let Olive and a big stick in. Brush hair, do hair and re-brush Isaac's teeth. Clean up the dog pee on the floor. (!?!?!?!) Dose out meds, some before breakfast, some during breakfast, some on the way out the door. Remove a Webkins from Olive's mouth. Write bad checks for lunch money. Remove a Little People from Olive's mouth, again. And I do this all while holding down my left eyelid which began twitching last night when I THOUGHT I just had my credit card number stolen. As the kids head out the door I grab three knives from the knife drawer and juggle them in the air just to top off the morning. And then I pull out the band-aids and we all head out the door to catch the bus.

Tada!

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